The Boys

Playing soccer with the boys all these years means they are used to me and will therefore say the most offensive, questionable things in front of me without a second thought. On a recent Thursday night, Graham, who looks like a 40 year old Burton Cummings, with the big handlebar moustache, had this conversation with me:

Graham: I had to buy these new white shorts for ball hockey.

Me: Yeah? Why white?

Graham: It’s a team thing. But guess what? They’re women’s shorts.

Me: What?!

Graham: Yeah, well, I hate shopping, so I went into the Bay to the sports department and bought the first pair I tried on and bought them. Then when I washed them the first time, I read the tag and.... damn.

Me: Well it doesn’t really matter I guess....they don’t look girly.

Graham: But I feel girly.

Me: Why?

Graham: Well, now I am starting to wonder if my ass looks fat.

Me: Very funny.

Graham: And once a month I can’t wear these shorts for a week.

Me: Aww, Dude....